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MindBodyGreen.com has this great article called “10 Signs You’ve Found The One.” Here on Dating Yourself, I like to view the article through a different filter, the one that says YOU are the one you’ve been waiting for.
So let’s look at a few of the 10 Signs:
#1 “Your partner is your best friend. You’re 110% yourself, you feel free, and enjoy the little things in life together.”
How would you describe your ideal best friend. Are you being that for yourself? Describe the 110% authentic version of yourself? How are you supporting yourself in fully realizing that version of yourself? List the “little” things you’d like to share with a partner. Are you currently waiting to enjoy those things with another person or can you enjoy them now?
#10 “You know that no matter what, he or she will always stand by you and be on your side.”
We often look to partners to be our best friends, playmates, intellectual equals, spiritual rocks, defenders, protectors, entertainers, honest reflections and so much more. Pick one of these attributes – or another that’s important to you – and list the thoughts, actions, qualities, etc. that a partner could have or do to show you that s/he is by your side. Now ask yourself, am I those things to myself?
There are some Signs on the list that really imply a second person in the relationship. But let’s bend the image a little bit:
#8 “When something happens—terrible, exciting or completely insignificant—he or she is always the first person you want to tell.”
I’m not encouraging voices or multiple personalities, but do you seek your own counsel? Do you trust your own advice? Do you have methods for listening to yourself, such as journaling, meditation, solitude or a craft?
#5 “The two of you compromise with each other. You don’t always get your way.”
When I hear advice like this, I ask myself if I am truly capable of compromise. Do I know my own real needs and desires? Am I listening to the other? Am I acting from a place of generosity? Is compromise really my goal (or is my goal to win, silence, hurt or to be heard, seen, understood)? All of these questions are valid when dealing with the Self. Think, for example, when you have choices on how to spend money, which decision to make, how to treat your body…these are all compromises between the many aspects of your Self.
The whole list is worth a read, whether you’re in a relationship with another person or cultivating your relationship with your Self. Click on over to MindBodyGreen to read “10 Signs You’ve Found The One.”